


Out Of My Mind

by qsigne



Series: Mindscape [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Eventual Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, F/M, Humor, M/M, Meta, Metafiction, Mildly Dubious Consent, Romance, sterek, Über-meta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-15
Updated: 2015-10-15
Packaged: 2018-04-26 12:57:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5005657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qsigne/pseuds/qsigne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everybody in Teen Wolf are threatened by… The Fandom.</p><p>""Why Stiles, I never thought you would be the one to crack over this," Peter said condescendingly, "Wasn't it you who showed me those delightful sites with all the stories and artwork in the first place?"<br/>"That's why I know how screwed we are!" wailed Stiles."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Out Of My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> (Notes on mild dubcon at the end)
> 
>  
> 
> It’s metafiction, just go with it :)
> 
> At an indefinite time in the Teen Wolf universe…

"Shit, shit, shit!" Stiles came running through the door and slammed it behind him. He smashed his back up against it, while gasping for breath.

Everybody looked startled up, and Derek and Scott were already fanged up and ready to fight.

"How far behind and what!" barked Derek, while Boyd began helping the humans move further back for safety. Stiles looked confused for a short second, and then waved his shaky hand dismissively.

"Nonono, not that kind of danger," he said with the remnants of panic in his eyes, "This is much worse! We can't defend ourselves from this!" He swallowed. "We are being moved! Into the head of a _fan girl!_ It’s all fan girls from now on! We're doomed!" He slid slowly down the door, until his butt landed on the floor with a depressing thump.

Scott looked confused while trying to understand the news; it made him look like a cross-eyed puppy. "But that's not new. We move heads all the time? In the beginning we never knew _which_ author we would wake up in. Remember the good old days with Jeff?" he said and smiled encouragingly at Stiles.

"He said into a _fan girl_ , you moron, that's a game changer,” Peter said from above, and took the stairs in one long jump, like the dramatic bastard that he was. He landed neatly right next to Derek, much lighter than you would have thought for a man of his impressive build. "And I for one have been waiting for this day."

Derek shifted ever so slightly towards him with a bit of fang.

"Relax nephew, I'm not going up against you or your precious pups.” Peter rolled his eyes in exasperation, “I am merely looking forward to experience the diversity of a free imagination, unhampered by profit or conventionality." Peter smiled cordially and made everybody shudder.

"Like I said, we're doomed!" moaned Stiles, pulling on his hair in desperation.

"Why Stiles, I never thought you would be the one to crack over this," Peter said condescendingly, "Wasn't it you who showed me those delightful sites with the stories and artwork in the first place?"

"That's why I know how screwed we are!" wailed Stiles. "I mean, I never thought the fandom would one day be bigger than the actual show! Otherwise, I would never have laughed at those things. Those horrors! I'm so stupid!"

"Could the rest of us please be brought up to date?" demanded Lydia and sat down again in the sofa and crossed her shapely legs, waiting to be obeyed. "First of all, how much time do we have, until the move takes place?"

"Yeah, and are any of us in danger of "She asked for a raise"?" Danny injected, "Isaac, Boyd and Erica are already hiding at my place, the rest are at Jackson’s and there's just not room for any more. It's so annoying when people are written out of the show."

"Time, Stiles, please!" Lydia snapped. Stiles visibly pulled himself together and wobbled over and sat down on the corner of the coffee table. "I'm not 100% certain, but we should have maybe," He looked at his watch, "30 to 35 minutes until moving time."

"So T minus 30 minutes. Objectives?" Lydia said.

"What?" Scott asked.

"What are we up against, and what should we do to minimize any damage," translated Stiles tiredly. "And well, just about anything can happen, that’s the problem. One of the problems," he added darkly.

“So be alert and be prepared,” said Boyd, “We can do that.”

“We-ell, yes and no,” said Stiles, fidgeting. “I mean, the monsters will be varied, but pretty textbook. We can however expect an extra surplus of unfriendly weres and succubae. Danny, you in particular should be alert on any changes in your emotions and your behavior when it comes to sex. I’m wagering you’ll either get bitten or discover a family secret previously unknown to you.” Danny’s eyebrows rose, but he just nodded in affirmation. “I'm on it,” he said, “Check.”

“And Jackson,” Peter said with a beaming smile, “You must be prepared to make out with Danny to control his hunger. While we all watch. For safety’s sake, naturally.”

Jackson’s face was suddenly drained of color. “Are you shitting me?!” he croaked and looked ready to kill somebody, “I’m not even his type! Although, I’m…”

“EVERYBODY’S TYPE.” the rest of the pack chorused.

“Well, sorry for having perfect bone structure, ass-wipes!” Jackson sneered. “You all wish you looked like this!” He gestured at himself.

“Sure. Except for the scaly skin. You should really try moisturizing.” Erica said sweetly.

Jackson looked daggers at her, but turned to Danny instead. “But seriously dude, this sucks! I do know you’re not, you know. Into me like that. It’ll just be a bro thing, OK? A bro helping out another bro. Cool?”

Danny just smiled and nodded and held up a fist. Jackson bumped it with visible relief, and then quickly turned away, a bit red in the cheeks. Danny looked at him fondly and a bit wistfully.

“If the homoerotic moment is over, might I suggest we move on to the next?” said Peter.

“The next what?” said Scott.

“Homoerotic moment of course.” Peter said smoothly. “Yours, in fact.”

“Me?!” squealed Scott, and looked ready to climb up a tree to safety, if there had been any trees nearby.

“Yes, _you_ , McCall.” said Jackson gleefully. “Can’t take it? Are you chicken? It takes _balls_ to take it up the ass, I bet you’re just too gay to...” Danny smacked the back of his head. “We talked about this, Jackson. Leave McCall alone,” he said. Jackson slouched in his seat pouting, and then childishly kicked Stiles instead.

“Ow!” Stiles said affronted.

“Yeah, don’t treat Stiles like that, he’s apparently my boyfriend!” declared Scott angrily. Stiles looked surprised at him and then grinned. “I should be so lucky, Scottie-Boy!” he said, “But unfortunately it’s not me you have to turn your Brown Steel towards.”

“Thank God!” said Scott, sagging with relief, “I mean, no disrespect dude, but eew! You’re like my brother.” He made an apologetic face. Stiles just waved it away, “None taken, buddy, I feel exactly the same. I’m just thankful I’m not a Winchester.”

“But who is it?” asked Allison, “I mean, I do have a stake in this.”

“Me,” it came timidly from the back of the room. Everybody turned towards Isaac, who had raised a tentative hand. “Huh,” Scott said intelligently, “I wouldn’t have guessed.” Isaac just shrugged.

“We can make this work, honey,” said Allison with a calculating look at Isaac, “Don’t worry about it.” She looked like a girl with something on her mind.

“Can we get on with the program? Time is running out.” Derek said with gritted teeth. Scott scowled a bit at him for almost interrupting Allison’s thoughts, but Stiles swatted at his knee.

“Don’t give him so much aggro, you know he's already the one who gets hurt the most,” he chided. “Except Peter of course, but that doesn’t count.”

“Stiles, my dear, aren’t you getting ahead of yourself here?” Peter drawled, achingly sweet, “Have you forgotten where we’re going?”

“Shit,” Stiles squeaked, “I had. Oh shit, oh shit. Peter,” he turned towards the werewolf pleadingly, “Can’t you go easy on me somehow? I mean, I don’t care what they say, some of those stories… It just doesn’t sound like much fun for anyone, not even you.”

“Are you going to harm Stiles?” Derek asked threateningly, suddenly standing with a clawed hand against Peter’s throat. Peter simply took a step back and said calmly: “I’m not going to do anything he won’t like. Love in fact.” He gave them both a sadistic smile. “I have been stockpiling toys for ages, just waiting for this day. Or for the nights, really, more accurately the nights.” Stiles looked pale, but Derek looked even paler.

“You mean, you and Stiles?” he said hoarsely.

Peter smiled like the asshole he was: “Yes, me and Stiles.”

“Dude… That’s harsh.” Scott said to Stiles, “I know what I said, but for the record, I’d totally be gay for you if you needed it, seriously. Especially if it saved you from Peter.”

“I appreciate it, buddy, but I guess this is where I take one for the team. I’ve been preparing myself mentally for this, just in case the unimaginable happened. A good precaution, as it so happens.”

“You have prepared yourself, Stiles, did I hear you correctly?” Peter grinned.

Stiles rolled his eyes at him. “Yes, yes, have your fun while it lasts, Wulfio. You know I won’t be the only one affected. You actually have to grow a heart, you know, that’s gotta hurt a whole lot more than some rough sex.”

“I know,” Peter said lightly and sauntered over to look out the window. Stiles eyes lingered for a while on him, with a look that could almost be called compassionate.

“So it’s all about sex?” Scott asked. “Don’t I get to Do The Right Thing?” He looked a bit lost. Stiles patted his leg comforting. “You’re going to take a step back for a while, my boy. But you’ll get plenty of time to play with Allison! And Isaac.”

“But I’m the star of the show, aren’t I?” Scott said uncertainly.

“Sure you are, Buddy!” Stiles said encouragingly, “But the fandom is crazy! Really crazy!” He waved his arms wildly in the air. “It’s sort of, more about, well, me. _Crazy_ , right?! Me and, and anyway,” He scratched the back of his head embarrassed, “You’ll be happy you’re not in my shoes. Pants. Just wait and see. I mean, I actually have to do everybody, and I do mean _everybody_. Nobody will go without a piece of Stile’s ass, oh no, it’s like it’s opposite-world! Even the twin’s impression of Andre the Giant gets a turn, and I am _so_ not looking forward to that, sorry guys, no disrespect. This is just not how I imagined my life to be when I was a kid, I’ll tell you that.”

He heard someone opening the front door, and turned in time to see Derek stalk out, slamming it behind him.

“What was that about?” frowned Scott.

Peter and Stiles shared a quick look across the room and Peter clapped his hands together for attention: “Gather round puppies! Uncle Peter will now tell you _all_ about the exiting prospects of the Omega-verse!” Stiles got up and followed Derek.

***

Derek was sitting on the edge of the stairs, looking down. The stairwell was almost completely dark, and Stiles only knew he was there, because the light from inside lit up his brooding back. He closed the door and carefully made his way over in the darkness, stopping when his hand touched leather. He sat down. Behind them he could hear the muted chatter of the pack.

_(“But I don’t want a self-lubricating anus!” “Don’t worry Scott, I’m sure in your case it’ll be Isaac.” “Oh, alright then.” “Dude!”)_

Stiles fidgeted a bit. “So are you…”

“I can’t take it anymore!” Derek exploded.

“Oh. Oh?” Stiles said warily.

“I just can’t! Live like this!” The last came out as a growl. “I just, I try to be cool and keep my distance, but it’s so _hard_ , and I’m so alone and, and _pathetic_ …!” Stiles could hear him heaving for breath and dared letting his hand squeeze his leather clad shoulder. Contrary to popular thought, he did know how to keep quiet, especially when Derek was speaking in whole sentences. Derek snarled.

“And don’t touch me like that!”

“Like what?” Stiles asked carefully. He was aware that Derek did not slap his hand away like he’d have expected.

“Like we’re friends! We’re not! You don’t even like me, you always laugh at me, and I can’t, I just can’t be friends with you.” Derek’s whole body was shaking, like he was keeping himself together by sheer force of will.

“Hey there, big guy, we’re friends,” Stiles said awkwardly and let his arm slip gently over Derek’s shoulders, trying not to spook him. “Friends who bitch at and save and bully each other, but still friends.”

“Well, I don’t want to be friends! You, I just. You just sit there, like it’s nothing!” He snarled, “Everybody! They’re all gonna touch you, and I just can’t do anything. I feel so powerless! And _pathetic_ , because I’m just the same, I want you too, like an idiot. So, just. Go away, Stiles.”

Stiles whole body went completely rigid. Even his breath became shallow and superficial, like he was trying not to scare Derek away with any loud noises.

“Derek?” he said very carefully, “This is where it’s very important that you listen to me. Very important. I know I say that a lot, but I really, really mean it right now. You gotta listen, and you just _have_ to let me finish. After that, I’ll do whatever you ask me, but please, _please_ listen, ok?” He moved his arm away, so his palm rested pleadingly against Derek’s elbow. “You know,” he said hesitantly, “When I came through that door earlier, I was really terrified.”

“Understandably,” Derek growled.

“Yeah, ok, but it’s not why you think. You think it was because of Peter and that stuff with the others, and it should be, but… It really doesn’t bother me that much. I mean, it does, but I’ll deal. And me and Peter, we do look like we hate each other, but I think we both kind of respect and perhaps even sort of like each other, and please God, don’t ever tell him I said so. But, in a sick and twisted way, we’re like, allies, you know? I trust him not to go overboard.”

“Do I _have_ to listen to you praise my homicidal uncle?” Derek said through clenched teeth.

“No, please just… Let me finish.” Stiles desperately grabbed Derek’s forearm with both hands.

“I’m here, aren’t I?” Derek sighed tiredly.

“Yes.” Stiles seemed to struggle for words. “So,” he finally said, “I wasn’t scared of all that, even though I should be, because some of that shit is seriously sick and demented. And the reason I wasn’t scared, is because something else scared me even more.” It was Stiles’ hands’ that trembled now and he took a firmer grip of Derek’s arm to still them. “I know you’re not a compulsive googler like me, so you haven’t seen all the fan stuff out there, and I have been so, so thankful for that! Because I would totally expect you to hit me, or laugh at me, or do _something_ if you knew. And that would just kill me, especially if you laughed. Especially if you knew how much time I have spent reading those stupid, stupid stories! Because. That stuff with Peter? That’s like, only two-three percent of everything out there. And all the others, all the combined stories about them, that’s maybe another two-three percent. Tops. The rest of it? That’s stories about you and me. About us. Happy stories. Of our epic romance. Don’t it just make you laugh?” He gave a humorless snort, sounding shaky and out of breath.

Derek didn’t move a muscle.

“And you think that’s funny?” he said, carefully keeping his voice even.

“No! But yes. I mean, shit, fuck, _ass!_ I had this whole speech prepared in my head, just in case, but I can’t remember anything, and this is not how I wanted to say it! You’re supposed to get it! That, that I’m scared, shitless, because I never get what I want! Stiles doesn’t get the girl! Guy, whatever. That’s why it’s so much safer to want someone like Lydia fucking Martin, because then I can’t hope, and it doesn’t hurt so much all the time. And then you show up, with your stupid… Everything, and you ruin it!” His voice broke in the end.

“Stiles,” Derek said quietly, after a while, “I’m another one who never gets what he wants.”

“Yeah?” Stiles sniffled.

“Yeah. And you heard me, I’m scared shitless too. Just look at my ridiculous life, I’m a mess! But I think I’m also very, very happy right now.” He took a deep breath and carefully rested his forehead against Stiles’.

“Yeah?” Stiles repeated breathlessly.

“Yeah.” Derek said. “And I-umph!” Stiles had launched himself at his mouth, and they both reached desperately for each other to keep their lips together. There was quiet on the stairs for a while, apart from the kissing and the slow rustling of clothes on skin when they moved.

_(“I do not do puppy piles. Are you aware how much Jackson farts?” “Hey!” “I had to sleep with the window open when we were together, and that was BB. Before the Bite, Scott. But after a full moon and with mangy squirrels inside?! I just don’t think so.” “Thanks for shitload, Lydia!” “Thanks for the smell of it, Jackson.”)_

Stiles broke the silence first, panting.

“Wow… I just. Wow. You actually, actually want me?”

“Yes. Desperately.” said Derek with a smile in his voice.

“Good! Because I think I’m hooked. Don’t know if I could give you up again.” They kissed some more, getting more frantic and heated.

“Time?” Derek gasped between kisses.

“Borrowed,” mumbled Stiles into his mouth, “Could be emmy mimoot now.”

“We’ll make it count then,” Derek said, and slid on top of Stiles. He rested on his elbows and paused in wonder.

“You’re so beautiful.” he said.

“So are you,” smiled Stiles blindly into the air, “Although I can’t actually see you right now, what with the human eyes and that. But you are, you know.” Derek chuckled, and let his face fall down in the crook of Stiles neck, basking in his smell.

“It’s funny, you know,” Stiles continued, staring into the darkness, his hands cradling Derek’s head, “In those stories, it’s almost always you who’s the closet romantic, and me, well, I’m the clumsy sex addict. But I am too, you know? Romantic? I mean, all those angsty tears and the epic biting, it’s gonna be great! Any minute now, we’ll be in some awesome story, and it’ll be awesome. Awesomly awesome. But, what I’m _really_ looking forward to, what I’m hoping I’ll get, anyway, is all the time around the stories, between the lines. When I wake up next to you, and it’s not some story, it’s just us, Derek and Stiles. Life, you know? That’s the stuff that feels romantic to me.”

“Aw Stiles,” Derek said quietly in a husky voice, “All that time is yours. All of it. I promise.” He began caressing Stiles’ mouth and neck with renewed vigor.

“Hello!” Stiles suddenly gasped enthusiastically, “Is that a knot in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?” Derek chuckled.

“Shut up, St

 

 

***

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> The premise, if this is not clear, is that the characters from Teen Wolf live inside of the mind of the person, who is focused on them the most.
> 
>  
> 
> (Mild dubcon: The people are fictional characters that change personality after whatever story they are in. They will like it when it happens, but beforehand they are not all enthused. Like playing a romantic role, with a non-romantic partner.)
> 
>  
> 
> Remember, a kudo is kindness, a comment is cool! (A bookmark is bonkers? Beautiful? BITCHIN’!)


End file.
